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Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Moff Tarkin is a really stupid name

Some things, none particularly interesting --



* * * FEAR MASTERS is trudging along. I could be writing it right now, but... I'm not. I'm going through one of those mood swings where I go over something I've written and it reads like absolute shit to me. Those are bad periods. However, then there are other times when I reread my own work and think I'm actually a pretty good writer. Obviously, the only valid conclusion to be drawn there is that I can't be objective about my own work, and will have to leave its judgment to others. Which is depressing, when you think of all the 'others' out there who keep rejecting it... oh, well.

There's this guy I know vaguely whom I find unpleasant, mostly because he's an even older geek than I am, and whenever I run into him, the only thing he can talk about is all the wonderful geek stuff he's done and accomplished in his life... how he's had all these games published and he has seven paperbacks in print and he's written and drawn all these comic books and all this other nonsense that, you know, I personally would give somebody else's left eye to have done.

Chances are he's full of shit -- I mean, he's clearly not prosperous and when you Google his name, all that comes back is his crappy Deviantart gallery. What I suspect, in fact, is that he's pretty much an alternate future version of me, the way I'd have most likely turned out if I hadn't been lucky enough to meet Superwife... I'd have ended up sitting in a geek shop somewhere, playing Magic and telling anyone who would sit down across the table from me (mostly kids, because nearly any adult would see through me immediately and walk off in disgust) all about my seven or eight novels and all the games I've designed and how I'm a great artist and all the comics I've scripted and how I knew famous comics pros back in college. Desperately scribbling in my sketchbook while pretending to be so immersed in what I'm doing that I'm totally unaware of my surroundings, while actually exquisitely aware of everyone else in the shop (especially the females) and hoping against hope that someone (female) would come over and express interest. Oh yeah. I know that tune so VERY well.

And the fact that I see so much of myself in him is probably one of the biggest reasons I can't stand him... and yet another entry on the endless list of things I am forever grateful to Superwife for.

However, I have read some of this dork's crappy writing, and I'm sure that's a big part of why I'm in such a funk over my own writing right now -- I think I'm a better writer than he is. But I can't really tell. And jesus, if I'm not a better writer than he is, I need to just give up in despair and go find a job in a carwash somewhere.

None of which really matters in any galactic or cosmic sense, but, then, I hardly ever write about anything that does.

I've just checked my stats counter and am somewhat bemused to see that apparently the ONLY person who has bothered to read either of the 'Fear Masters' entries to date is Mr. X. I have a pretty good idea who Mr. X actually is... not that I'm brilliant or anything, but SuperWife made a pretty spot on suggestion the other day, and I'm as sure as I can be without actual photographic evidence that she's right... and if he's the only person reading this thing, then, well, I'm not greatly moved to keep putting chapters up every now and then. I'll put the whole thing up, probably over on my Angelfire page, with yet another bad cover mock up, when I get it done. Until then, I'm sure the other five or six of you who read this thing won't miss it.

As always, I'm selling off my HeroClix on Ebay. The latest bunch of auctions that just concluded were a mixed bag, economically. On the one hand, some guy walked off with my West Coast Avengers team, including a Vet Fantastic Forces Hawkeye and a NGN bronze ring Iron Man, for two bucks. On the other hand, my Kingdom Come group sold for $129. So I guess that kind of balances out.

I have an X-Box 360 and a copy of MASS EFFECT!!!! Bane got a new one and loaned me his old one for a couple of months, so I could play through the game at least once. You'd think I'd be delighted, but in fact, I've tried to play the game a few times and am very disappointed with it. It's much, MUCH more military than I'd expected, and I really don't much care for that kind of atmosphere. Plus, I find myself baffled by most of the control screens, and the game also seems to have a lot of 'timer tasks' in it, i.e., things your character has to do within a certain set time limit, or DIE!!!! I hate that crap; I've never been good at getting stuff done while someone is holding a stopwatch on me, and certainly don't relish doing it as part of something that's supposed to be 'recreation'.

Super Drama Teen, naturally, has nearly beaten the game by now, but she likes HALO and all that crap, and seems to have a brilliant innate talent for that sort of thing. If that child could get paid to play videogames, or if videogames were an Olympic sport, she'd be set for life, I swear.

I have chores to do today -- a couple of packages of HeroClix to take to the post office, one of the bathrooms needs cleaning, I'm sure there are dirty dishes in the sink, and eventually, I'll have to go over and pick up Super Adorable Kid at her school. It's not like having a full time job, but it does cut into my nap time.

Okay, whiney as this is, I guess I'll post it and go do something I'm supposed to be doing.

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