Quickly, now

* There sure are a lot of people I don't know who are sending me email about how small my dick is. Somehow, that just seems... rude.

* Mike Norton has apparently died. This makes me sad.

* This is my 475th post on this blog. God knows how many posts I put up on previous blogs, although, as they're all still floating around random corners of the Internet, I suppose I could go back and check. But that sounds like work.

* I've been rereading some Travis McGee lately. Often there's a McGee sitting out on my desk at work while I'm taking calls. People come and go. There's this special contempt I feel for people whose eyes pass right over PALE GREY FOR GUILT or THE QUICK RED FOX without hesitation, without comment, without what seems to me should be the near obligatory "Oh, wow, Travis McGee! I love John D. MacDonald's stuff, but the Travis McGee books are really amazing". Contempt for a fellow human is, of course, not a reaction that reflects well on me (or anyone else, really) and I'm aware it's completely unfair -- every once in a while I see someone else reading something else, and it's never anything I feel any urge to stop and admire -- but then, nowadays, if you see someone at work reading something, chances are it's going to be the Bible, or some religious tract. Nrrrrm. It's a strange world, where nobody gives a shit about Travis McGee any more, and the only other people besides me who carry books are Born Agains.

* On that subject, whatever happened to the King James Bible? If you're going to read the Bible, you should at least read those fine funky rolling pseudo Old English syllables. I go out on the web and type in a random search for Bible quotes and it gives me this:

Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know.

This, I am meant to believe, is Jeremiah 33:3, but it is no such thing. Jeremiah 33:3 reads --

Call unto me, and I will answer thee, and shew thee great and mighty things, which thou knowest not.

Frrmf. No wonder nobody cares about Travis McGee any more, in an era of watered down Bible verses.

And -- I'm sorry, but 'unsearchable'? What retard decided to replace 'mighty' with 'unsearchable'?

* I cleared my spam out before I sat down to write this post, and in the time it's taken me to type the above (not long, I type you like a hurricane) I've gotten one more email from Dr. Patty Carey, who seems to feel the size of my manhood is inadequate. I'll bet if John Holmes were still alive, he'd be getting email like this, too. But he'd just laugh at it.

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