Web Search nikon coolpix digital cameras The Miserable Annals of the Earth: Cyber haiku

Thursday, April 13, 2006

Cyber haiku

I found these while going through some old blog posts -- an old regular commenter, danjp62, put them up in one of my earliest comment threads. I think they're pretty funny, and of course, still applicable to far too many electronic snafus. And I also have very little else to say about stuff right now, and no one's leaving comments but Tammy and Scott anyway, so making more of an effort on this blog right now seems kinda pointless.

Don't worry. I'll get back into the mood eventually.

In the meantime, though, thanks to Tammy, I have a spanking new hit counter/tracker which tells me where everyone comes to this site from and what their ISPs mean, so I know ALL of my regular commenters have been here lately, along with a few other people I don't recognize, and, you know, apparently had nothing to say, for which there is no one to blame but myself, but, still, it's a big No Fun.

However, never mind ME, attend to the poetry --

Your file was so big.
It might be very useful.
But now it is gone.

The Web site you seek
Cannot be located,
but Countless more exist.

Chaos reigns within.
Reflect, repent, and reboot.
Order shall return.

Program aborting:
Close all that you have worked on.
You ask far too much.

Windows NT crashed.
I am the Blue Screen of Death.
No one hears your scream.

Yesterday it worked.
Today it is not working.
Windows is like that.

First snow, then silence.
This thousand-dollar screen dies
So beautifully.

With searching comes loss
And the presence of absence:
"My Novel" not found.

The Tao that is seen
Is not the true Tao-
until You bring fresh toner.

Stay the patient course.
Of little worth is your ire.
The network is down.

A crash reduces
Your expensive computer
To a simple stone.

Three things are certain:
Death, taxes and lost data.
Guess which has occurred.

You step in the stream,
But the water has moved on.
This page is not here.

Out of memory.
We wish to hold the whole sky,
But we never will.

Having been erased,
The document you're seeking
Must now be retyped.

Serious error.
All shortcuts have disappeared.
Screen. Mind. Both are blank....


At 1:28 PM , Blogger SuperFiancee said...

Tracker and Counter
Are no substitute
For comments from one’s readers

Slacking on writing
Won’t alleviate
The problem in the long run

Plus, one’s chickie poo
Tends to get cranky
When she has no new reading

Cranky Chickie Poo’s
And no new blog posts
Are a bad combination

At 2:46 PM , Blogger Opus P. Penguin said...

SG-excellent. Love haiku #2. I'd like it on a mug. Or a screensaver. Under my tenth-grade English teacher's face.

H- Sorry, I've been busy. And I suck at poetry.

At 2:58 PM , Blogger Highlander said...

Sorry, all. Shitty calls at work have me in a similar mood. Obviously, folks can leave comments or not, and I shouldn't be snarky about it. I do appreciate the feedback, though. Thanks.

At 2:01 AM , Blogger Carmichael said...

Hello highlander.

No more lurking. I am an official blogger.

Great haiku. Great writing, for that matter. I enjoy reading your thoughts.

At 4:22 AM , Blogger MJ Norton said...

I haven't been up for much of anything for the past couple weeks, and it's been reflected over on my blog via silences and only coming up long enough to gripe about trivia. Ill fit as company and running on corroding batteries, I've been letting nearly everything pass without comment.

At 4:24 AM , Blogger MJ Norton said...

Oh! As far a trackers go, I know that from time to time I've come across one or two with some marvelous capabilities, but it was always when I was in a rush to something else. If I search my bookmarks I'll likely be able to find one of them, but I casually bookmark a great many things and they soon become as lost as Indy's Ark.

At 6:23 AM , Blogger AaA said...

One of my co-workers had a slew of those on her office door.

Sorry, I got nuthin. IBS has been tormenting me all night.

At 11:27 AM , Blogger Highlander said...

SG -- great stuff. Don't worry, I'll always write something for you. Even when all else is bleak, you're always my inspiration.

Laurpus -- no guilt trip was intended. I was just feeling pissy due to pissy people calling me at work. But thanks for the note.

Carmichael -- thanks for delurking. I'll be checking out your blog once there's more up at it.

Mike -- yeah, SG and I are aware that you've been sinking into one of your isolationist funks again. Fight it! All is not lost! We may yet elevate ourselves to the immateria.

Nate -- I don't know what IBS is.

At 5:03 PM , Blogger Opus P. Penguin said...

I'll answer for whoever that was, 'cause I'm here and all. IBS is irritable bowel syndrome. It sucks. Basically.

H - It's OK to be snarky. Don't sweat it. I've been snarky all week. And I don't even work at a call center. Maybe this awful thirty-second stab at haiku will explain my snarkiness:

When spouses don't sleep
It's not a good thing
To be in same house.

At 7:17 PM , Blogger AaA said...

The Syndrome mentioned,
affects the lower colon.
It is not pleasant.

When a man sits down,
in the place called bathroom stall,
trickling sounds are wrong.

After so many wipes,
even the softest of tissue,
feels like sandpaper.

(I'd like to note for the record that all of those haikus are 5-7-5 syllable counts, and therefore spot-on haikus.)


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