Only as good as your tools

So, I've been working on my House Rules lately. And posting to the forums over at the WizKids site, mostly on how dissatisfied I've been with the general dial design philosophy of WK's new chief game designer.

Of course, when you start bitchin', things take on a life of their own, and what started out with me just venting in general about how aggravated I was to now have three full expansions from WizKids in which every fucking character has a 9 attack, eventually segued into how generally annoyed I was with WK's rather idiotic rules structure for their HeroClix game. And from there, I started talking about my House Rules, which are, of course, far far superior to the contrived, poorly designed, enormously frustrating, and appallingly incompatible rules structure that WizKids insists on inflicting on my favorite superhuman characters.

Now, the good thing about these chat threads was that quite a number of people were interested in my opinions, and have even decided to start playing with my House Rules, because, you know, they're way better than the normal WizKids regulations.

As I say, that's a good thing. I always like finding like minded souls out there.

The bad thing about these chat threads is, well, the number of immature, hateful, meanspirited, narrowminded, intolerant, and, generally, subliterate dolts that cohere out of the very ether whenever anyone anywhere posts an intelligent (which means, nearly by definition, controversial) opinion anywhere on the Internet.

Now, one of the things I do in chat threads, when my normally civil (if, as I say, intelligent and controversial) posts start drawing responses that are rude and disrespectful, is, when at all possible, I mock my opponents' inability to spell accurately or construct sentences correctly.

This is, apparently, in a moderated forum, a big no no. It will enrage many, especially moderators, and turn people who might otherwise agree with one virulently against one.

This is, in my opinion, retarded.

The Internet is still, for the most part, a textual medium. A forum such as the one WizKids runs is very nearly in its entirety textual. Now, if you enter a cooking contest and you don't know the difference between eggs and milk, or how to set the temperature on the oven, or that you probably shouldn't try to fry a steak on a paper plate, the other contestants who have mastered these basic rudiments of the craft certainly have a right to point out your shortcomings in this area.

Similarly, I am of the opinion that if you want to go out on the Internet and talk a lot of trash to someone you don't know, well, you at the very least should know how to fucking spell. And if you don't, and you're talking trash to me (or a friend of mine) I am going to point out that you're a subliterate dumbass. I most likely won't do it if you're being civil to me, because many reports to the contrary, I'm not a complete buttmunch. But if you want to start something with me in a textual forum, well, you'd better float like a butterfly and sting like a bee... or, at the very least, you'd better know how to spell 'float', 'butterfly', 'sting', and 'bee'.

Or I'll crucify you.

Except, of course, on moderated forums. Because on these forums, asswipes can sneer and posture and strut all they want. They can roll their eyes and nudge each other and imply that they've heard it all before and accuse you of 'hypocracy' and call your posts 'mastibitory' and even mention how they wish someone would come over to your house and beat you up. What happens? Nothing. The omnipresent moderators remain utterly silent. However, point out that the people doing this sneering and strutting and eye rolling and name calling can't fucking spell, and suddenly some two faced turd named Darius_Dax is up your ass, warning you that if you keep it up, he'll throw you off the board and lock all your chat threads.

Because, you know, name calling and threats of violence and general rudeness, well, that's fine. But when you mock someone else's inability to master the basic rudiments of the medium they are abusing with their abuse, well... then you're a menace, and you have to be stopped.

All of this makes me feel a little bit like Harrison Bergeron.

Excuse me, while I kiss the ceiling.